This Naked Mind Podcast

Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 947 Trigger Warning: This episode mentions a pregnancy loss and substance abuse. What if it’s not giving up the substance that you fear? Deb and Rosie are both finding success in their breaks from alcohol and THC, respectively. They don’t realize it until Coaches Cole and Hayley ask the right questions, but both women are now facing the fear of change. Are they ready for all the ways life might look different (and maybe even better) now that they are fully living it? Deb discusses: ● The moment Coach Cole names her fear of changing, and she agrees ● What her “dopamine tiger” has to say once a calmer part of her takes the lead ● The internal earthquake that told her something was already shifting ● The one small, doable step she commits to for her Path group Rosie discusses: ● Why she picked the word rise, and what almost stopped her from living up to it ● The belief that she doesn’t deserve good things, traced straight back to her parents ● Two losses she’s never let herself…

Where Are They Now? | EP 946 "I had to pick one life or the other." That's how Sabrina describes the ultimatum to stop drinking her husband gave her two years ago. Sabrina is back to catch up with Hayley and explore what happens in that time between learning to live alcohol-free and truly living an alcohol-free life. Her key takeaway for other moms? Quitting doesn't clear out the mental space alcohol used to take up all on its own, you have to notice what's still empty and actually fill it, on purpose. Sabrina and Coach Hayley discuss: Why the ultimatum wasn't actually the hardest part, and what came after it was What "mental real estate" means once alcohol stops taking up space in your head What finally convinced Sabrina to give up marijuana completely How villainizing alcohol, instead of herself, rewrote the story she tells about her past What it's like watching four daughters grow up without ever seeing their mom drunk And more on letting one person all the way in, and what it really means to find your…

Five o'clock. It's like an internal alarm that goes off for Sandra. The day goes from manageable to get me the heck out of here as soon as the clock flips. For Lucy, it usually hits mid-afternoon: the realization that today won't be Day 1 alcohol-free after all. Drinking to check out is so normal that most people will tell you it isn't a problem at all, but that isn't for anyone else to decide. It's up to Sandra and Lucy to choose what role alcohol will have in their lives. Lucy discusses: The two voices in her head, arguing again Why she thinks she “deserves” a drink every night Her father's death, her husband's cancer, and the return to the Path What her relationship with wine has to do with her closeness to her brother Sandra discusses: Expectation: the thing she didn't know she was addicted to The kindergarten memory Coach Zoe keeps circling back to Golf, Mahjong, and why staying busy matters more than she thought Wise adult, adaptive child, wounded child: the three Sandras And more… Ready to take the…

5 a.m., and the bottles go out before anyone's awake. A soft clink of glass against the can, quick hands, quicker steps back inside. For years this was Michelle's ritual, drink alone, hide it, wake up and do it again. A DUI didn't stop it. A year and a half without a drink during COVID didn't stop it. One sentence, heard on a commute to work, finally put a stop to her cycle of drinking alone and hiding it. Michelle and Coach Cole discuss: Growing up with a mother whose drinking shaped a lifelong anxiety Michelle didn't understand until years later Why marijuana, not alcohol, came first, and what changed in her mid-twenties The private ritual of disposing of empty bottles before dawn, and what it revealed about the shame she was carrying A DUI, a year and a half alcohol-free during COVID, and why neither one was the real turning point The one unexpected concept that finally undid years of moderating, relapsing, and starting over And more on shame, self-trust, and what it means to finally feel like one whole…

Trigger Warning: This episode mentions death by suicide and death from alcohol use. Something is wrong with me. Five words, but they can resonate in your brain over and over again for decades. That's the reality Lisa and Michelle have been living with day in and day out. To the point where drowning that voice out with wine was the only way to find peace. Or so they thought. Coaches Cole and Zoe offer a new perspective and a pathway to healing. Lisa discusses: The list of 15 friends who disappeared from her life, and what she'd decided it meant about her The one letter her father ever wrote her, sent the year before he died of alcoholism Why "people just lose touch" was the hardest reframe she'd ever been asked to try on The difference between giving from love and giving to keep someone from leaving Michelle discusses: The exact age she started drinking, and what it gave her that nothing else did Why "turn that frown upside down" became the rule that shaped her whole childhood Becoming a people pleaser, and…

How do you quit drinking when your job is getting other people to drink? For years, that was Kelly's daily reality. She sampled wine and liquor with retailers all day, then went out drinking with her coworkers once the samples were done, and some nights she couldn't drive home afterward. She kept a tablecloth in the back seat of her car for exactly those nights, climbing back there to sleep it off instead of getting behind the wheel. Quitting drinking while working in alcohol sales meant unlearning her entire job description, and almost ten months later, she no longer needs that tablecloth. Kelly and Coach Cole discuss: Growing up with wine treated as a nightly ritual, and how that shaped her first years of drinking Losing her senior season and her team captaincy after one night out with alcohol What working in alcohol sales and distribution did to her drinking, and what daily industry culture looked like from the inside Tracking her drinks in an app and mistaking a lower number for freedom Learning to treat…

Trigger warning: This episode mentions disordered eating and self-harm. “You either drink, or you don’t,” Kelly’s husband actually said to her. If only it were that simple, like there’s a switch you can just flick and the desire to drink evaporates. While that might be true for some people, most of us find the path to freedom much harder. Jules knows that, and she knows how hard being honest with the people you love about your drinking can be. When you’re stuck in the loop between blame, shame, and guilt, honesty seems hard to come by. Coaches Zoe and Cole help Kelly and Jules find peace with what was and hope for what’s to come. Kelly discusses: Realizing her drinking was a way to make an unsustainable marriage feel sustainable How her husband’s “black and white” view of quitting fed a cycle of shame and blame The one idea from The Path that reframed everything for her, and what changed once she stopped drinking alone in her bedroom Renaming herself from “Blackout Kelly” to “Clear Kelly,” and what created…

Twenty-four hours of food poisoning on an all-inclusive holiday, and Helen's body made a decision before her mind caught up. She'd been drinking that week too, the way she always did with her sister, and somewhere in the middle of being violently sick she found herself pleading with her own stomach: no more, nothing else toxic, please. She got home and never drank again. You don't need an excuse not to drink once your body has already made the case for you, and two years later, she still describes the moment as a decision made in an instant. Helen and Coach Cole discuss: ● Sneaking sips of wine and gin as a kid, and how alcohol felt like the ultimate grown-up, exciting thing ● Getting so drunk on her 18th birthday that her parents thought she'd been spiked with something worse than alcohol ● Needing “a valid reason” not to drink once her kids weren't little anymore, and how strange that felt to admit out loud ● The bout of food poisoning on holiday with her sister that made the decision for her, in an…

What does it take to stop shaming yourself for drinking again? Sarah and Katie are trying to figure that out. It's easy to say that you need to change through compassion, self-love, and empathy, but putting that into practice is a much different story. Coach Hayley and Coach Cole use their training and their own experiences with drinking again to help Sarah and Katie use curiosity instead of blame and shame. Sarah discusses: Why over 100 days alcohol-free hasn't erased the fear that one bad day could send her back to hair of the dog Trusting the tools she's learned instead of the shame and blame she used to reach for first Bartending without missing the version of herself who used to drink through her shifts The intervention her sister and best friend staged, and why she couldn't hear it at the time Katie discusses: The "why" she keeps circling back to after relapsing months into a daily wine habit Reframing withdrawal agitation as her body healing instead of a sign something's wrong The 90 percent of her…

Six years ago, Payal looked in the mirror the morning after a blackout and finally had enough of herself. She's back on Where Are They Now to talk about how to quit drinking as a mom when mommy wine culture makes it feel normal, and what six years actually built: a dad and two sisters who gave up alcohol right along with her, and two boys who have never once seen their mom drunk. Payal and Coach Hayley discuss: Growing up believing a drink was the only way to build real confidence, and what she knows now that she didn't then The four-pack of small wine bottles hidden at the bottom of the trash, and the mommy wine culture that made it feel normal Why she could never just have one, and the single therapist conversation that finally connected the dots What it actually looks like to quit drinking as a mom when your spouse still drinks Learning how to have fun without alcohol again, after believing for years it wasn't possible And more on the "playing the tape forward" trick she still uses today, and finding your…

Learning how to stop feeling left out when you quit drinking starts, for Brenda, with a very specific list: people who can supposedly drink like it's nothing and never seem to pay for it. Kate's experience looks different: a friend in recovery who stopped getting invited to things, and a dinner this weekend she's already rehearsing lines for. Listen as our coaches help Brenda and Kate separate fact from fiction and learn why regular drinkers don’t exist. Brenda discusses: Why "regular drinkers" turned out to be a myth she was ready to test A "party with a price tag," and what that persona actually cost her Three years in a weight loss program, and the math she'd never done The two rooms Coach Zoe asks her to choose between, and which one she picks Kate discusses: Why she'd rather say "I'm taking a break" than let anyone use the word "problem" The word "stigma," and why it fits alcohol in a way it never fit quitting smoking The specific tactics for a dinner, a band, and zero big announcements The two truths…

Trigger Warning: This episode includes mentions of a medical emergency and a homicide. Sunday morning, and Brenda can't get out of bed. Her head is pounding hard enough that she genuinely believes she might die from it, so she turns over and doesn't get up again until one in the afternoon. She'd been retired for years by then, a daily schedule and routine filled with wine instead, and what she labeled relaxing was really drinking out of boredom. A couple of glasses had turned into a full box, then a bottle most nights, one more way to use up hours a twenty-year police career used to take up on its own. A week later, she threw that box of wine in the trash. Brenda and Coach Cole discuss: Starting the police academy, getting married, and quitting drinking, all in the same month, years apart Why retiring in 2013 removed the one thing that had kept her drinking in check Naming the voice in her head Dave, and talking back to him out loud in the car The pink cloud moment driving home along the lake six weeks after…

Trigger warning: This episode contains references to disordered eating and the death of a parent following a medical complication. “I'm actually on day twenty-six alcohol-free right now, the first time since I was pregnant with my daughter,” Bethany says. Bev has been counting differently: hers started January 13th, and her husband hasn't missed a single one of his own drinking nights since. Bethany and Bev work with Coaches Hayley and Cole on how to quit drinking when your spouse still drinks. Bethany discusses: • The exact moment four years ago that changed everything, and the nights she still can't escape it • Why she calls herself a “cheater” when it comes to quitting, and what she means by it • The one word she used to describe what alcohol really was to her • What Coach Hayley asked her about her father, and what Bethany said back Bev discusses: • A resentment she didn't know she was carrying, until the alcohol was gone and there was nowhere left to hide it • Living with a cancer diagnosis that makes…

Annie Grace grew up in a cabin with no running water, no electricity, and a dad who never drank. A decade later, in a corporate job in New York City, she was pouring close to two bottles of wine a night, buying the boxed kind so nobody would notice when one ran out. In this episode, she sits down with Mike Marshall, CEO of the U.S. Alcohol Policy Alliance, on his podcast The Shift, to talk about what the alcohol industry doesn’t want you to know, and why “drink responsibly” was never really about you. Annie and Mike discuss: Annie’s own story, from a childhood with no drinking in the house to two bottles of wine a night, and the moment that finally stopped her in her tracks Why “drink responsibly” sounds helpful but was never really written with the drinker in mind What a former alcohol industry executive admitted about targeting the heaviest drinkers, and building the alcopop to hook teenagers Why alcohol has carried a carcinogen label for decades, and why most of us never got the memo Annie’s “grace first”…

Why can’t I just have one drink? For Pamela, that question comes from her struggle to moderate her drinking, and for Claude, it sits in her fear of never being able to drink again. Same question but from two very different perspectives. Coaches Cole and Hayley work with Pamela and Claude to discover what sits behind these questions and to find out why one drink never stays one drink for most of us. Pamela discusses: Fifty-three easy days, then a Friday night phone call from friends that flipped the switch Why the third night lined up with the anniversary of her ex-husband's death Why she uses alcohol to "let go of what's heavy," and what it's really protecting her from Coach Cole's question about her daughter that undid six years of believing she had to handle things alone Her real commitment for the next time the Ferris wheel comes back around Claude discusses: Why the idea of "never again" feels like free fall and grief, not relief Tracing the "glitter" back to cocktails, galas, and a stressful career, and…

Judd never considered that he would quit drinking before turning forty. After all, for twenty-five years he would pick the idea up and put it down as regularly as if it were his morning coffee. But one day he picked up a receipt for a book he'd bought two years earlier yet never read. Suddenly the countdown was on, and he was no longer willing to keep the idea of quitting drinking before forty on the shelf. It was now time to change. Judd and Coach Cole discuss: How buying The Alcohol Experiment in January 2020 and not reading it for months planted the seed that eventually took hold Why turning quitting into a 30-day, then 90-day, then six-month goal made an impossible habit feel achievable The moment his now-wife suggested he aim for a year instead of six months, and why he said yes How he used the rawness of his first alcohol-free months to write a novel exploring AI, free will, and addiction Why naltrexone and other medications raise real questions about free will, even when they work What it was like to…

What does it take to figure out how to stop relying on alcohol for confidence? Amy needed eleven months alcohol-free, followed by more stops and starts than a city bus has, to decide something needed to change. For Dee, it was an entire wedding weekend and the fear of being the only one without a drink in her hand that made her realize alcohol was holding way too much headspace for her. Coaches Zoe and Cole help both women discover the confidence that was already inside them all along. Amy discusses: Going 30 days alcohol-free, then 11 months, then letting red wine back in "on a limited basis" and watching it unravel The cognitive dissonance between her morning self and her evening self, and why they actually want the same thing An ADHD diagnosis at seventeen and a lifelong feeling of being unpredictable to herself A snowy backyard, a hot tub, and proof that an urge really does pass if you outlast it Dee discusses: An entire wedding weekend built around alcohol, and the fear she hadn't said out loud yet Why…

Deb's Naked Life | EP 920 If you're thinking about stopping drinking in your 60s but keep telling yourself you're too old, too set in your habits, or too far gone, Deb's story is the one you need to hear. She was a registered nurse who had directed a hospital addiction recovery program and still didn't see herself in it. She was caring for a dying parent, married to a heavy drinker, and drinking three to four glasses of wine every night before a single book changed the entire frame. She became alcohol-free at 62 and hasn't looked back once. Deb and Coach Cole discuss: Growing up alcohol naive, not drinking until her late 20s, and watching it quietly become a nightly habit, she barely chose Directing a hospital addiction recovery program and still telling herself she wasn't like the patients in it Reading This Naked Mind cover to cover with wine in hand, crying at the parts that felt like her own story Stopping drinking while caregiving for her mother with dementia, and finding she could finally be present in…

⚠️ Trigger warning: This episode contains references to domestic violence and a mental health crisis. Who am I without alcohol? Does that question sound eerily familiar? Steph and Nicole both find themselves grappling with that very idea and wondering what the answer will mean for them. Steph is 55, and alcohol has been by her side and has helped define her for most of her adult life. Nicole looks to alcohol for the answers and to smooth the rough edges, and isn’t sure if she’s capable of being herself with a glass in her hand. Coaches Cole and Hayley help provide guidance and hope in this week’s episode. Steph discusses: Why "loss of identity" became the real subject of her coaching call, not just the drinking The belief that she'd failed herself and her friends, and how that belief kept her stuck Why chasing a "finished" identity by a deadline backfires The threshold metaphor, and why stepping into the unknown feels safer than staying somewhere familiar but unwanted Her plan to resign from teaching by May…

What does building a life you don't want to escape from actually take? Donna joined The Path in March 2021 after a COVID grocery store moment she couldn't unsee and hasn't had a drink since. Now five years in, she's back with Coach Hayley to share what's genuinely changed, what she's still working through, and a question that keeps getting more interesting. Donna and Coach Hayley discuss: That COVID grocery store moment, four wine clubs in a week, and what she calls "the gift COVID gave her" The beta reader who said her memoir should have said more about her drinking, and what she heard two weeks later Why confidence was her number one benefit from stopping, and how alcohol was worsening her anxiety while she believed it was helping The 90-second rule for processing difficult emotions without numbing, and the morning practice she's built over five years Why building a life you don't want to escape from is still the deeper work at year five And more on forgiveness, gratitude, and what five years of alcohol…

⚠️ Trigger warning: This episode contains references to childhood abuse, parental alcoholism, and the death of a parent from alcohol-related illness. Most of us were never taught how to give ourselves grace about drinking, only how to judge ourselves for it. Kelly and Amber are proof that the shame and guilt show up no matter how different the situation looks. For Kelly, it shows up after a weekend of drinking that went further than she planned. For Amber, it shows up the moment someone she's dating asks why she's not drinking, and a much older fear takes over. Kelly discusses: Why her biggest data point yet, a full night out at a friend's timeshare, left her more unsettled than any smaller one had The real difference between "I've proven I can" drink moderately and "I've proven I can" have a great time without it Why Coach Hayley adds the word "yet" every time Kelly says she can't figure out why she drinks Admitting she's skipped a Path call because she didn't want to say out loud that she'd had a fun night…

Trigger warning: This episode contains references to drunk driving, DWIs, and thoughts of not wanting to live. Zita was in her kitchen in 2017, working up the nerve for a hard conversation with her boyfriend, when the thought arrived: "You know what would make this easier?" She took a shot to self-soothe before the conversation, and it worked so well that her brain filed alcohol away as the answer to hard moments from then on. She's a registered nurse in her mid-30s who felt nothing when she watched other people drink, all the way through nursing school, with no reason to think that thought would change anything. It did. Three years and several DWIs later, one blacked-out night finally made her stop and ask what she was doing. Now approaching five years alcohol-free, she shares her story. Zita and Coach Cole discuss: How one shot before a hard conversation taught her brain a lesson it never unlearned Why year two brought DWIs and car accidents, then a family intervention she wasn't ready to hear The hiding…

⚠️ Trigger warning: This episode contains references to psychological and emotional abuse in a marriage. The answer to "why I use alcohol to cope" is rarely what you expect. For Will, it’s buried in a need for control he's carried since a chaotic childhood. For Kathleen, it comes from decades of being the one everyone else leans on. Coaches Cole and Zoe help Will and Kathleen take steps towards freeing themselves from that weight. Will discusses: Decades of using alcohol to quiet a busy brain, and what happens after the first beer Why knowing the pattern isn’t enough The childhood fear of instability that shows up as a desperate need for answers and control Coach Cole’s reframe: curious versus combat, connect versus control A body scan moment where he notices tension in real time and releases it The video game map metaphor — taking the next step without needing to see the whole path Kathleen discusses: Being introduced to alcohol at 16 as a social crutch when she moved to a new town What her mother modeled,…

Trigger warning: This episode contains references to the alcohol-related death of a family member. Is it possible to build something meaningful out of the worst loss of your life? For Kelly, the answer arrived just five months after she got free from alcohol herself. That's when her brother died from the same thing she'd spent years measuring her own drinking against. She built Perfectly Made AF in response, a nonprofit funding alcohol freedom scholarships in his memory and an annual Boulder gala designed to prove an alcohol-free life is anything but boring. Kelly's Naked Life story traces how she got there, from years of comparing her own drinking to his, to the two days after his funeral when she had to choose what came next. Kelly and Coach Cole discuss: What almost happened two days after her brother's funeral, five months into her own alcohol-free life Why "I'm not him" was the comparison that let her avoid her own drinking for years The message she wrote her brother a month before he died, and why it…

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussion of traumatic brain injury. Are you drinking to escape your life? Catherine was. She called it the escape room. Rachael didn't use those words, but she'd no doubt agree with them. If you're drinking to escape a life that feels like too much, too heavy, and too demanding, you'll want to tune in. Catherine and Rachael work with Coaches Hayley and Zoe to stop seeing alcohol as a way out, and start learning how to stay present even when life feels like too much. Catherine discusses: The "escape room" she built around wine and what happened when she closed the door for good The in-control/out-of-control list Coach Hayley walks her through, and why it matters Grieving the life she thought her daughter would have, and what getting stuck in that future costs her The turnaround: "I'm willing to consider things might be okay if I don't try to fix it" Rachael discusses: Why she's more nervous about Saturday night than Friday night, and what that tells her The reference…

For 32 years, Travis was a functional drinker who never got a DUI, never missed a day of work, and never fit the picture most people hold when they hear "drinking problem," but spent years hiding beers in the garage, lying to his wife about the count, and woke up after one Christmas morning knowing his kids had been worried Santa wasn't coming. He came to This Naked Mind thinking he might be able to moderate. He joined The Path in November 2023, had one more bad birthday, and threw out the last two bottles of a Wisconsin six-pack the next day. He's at 757 days alcohol-free. Coach Cole Harvey is here to hear him tell it. Travis and Coach Cole discuss: The pit party at 18 that set up a chase he'd spend the next 32 years trying to get back to Hiding beers in the garage, counting them in his head and lying about the number, and why the "alcoholic" label kept him from asking for help for years The Christmas his kids were worried Santa wasn't coming, and why even that didn't break the cycle A 2023 job loss that…

Andrew and Adele both know why they need alcohol to socialize — or think they do. For Adele, 64 and living in a New Zealand wine region, it started at 14 in the back of a school bus and never really stopped being about fitting in. For Andrew, who is navigating a late-life ADHD diagnosis and the possible end of his marriage, the answer turned out to go a lot deeper than the social stuff. Andrew discusses: His late-life ADHD diagnosis and why emotional dysregulation makes the pull toward alcohol so much harder to catch. Realizing he has never felt safe — and how his body already knew that before he did What finally made his marriage struggles make complete sense The hand-on-heart technique from Coach Zoe and how it's helping him regulate in real time Finding The Path after his wife asked for a divorce — and what group coaching calls unlocked Adele discusses: Fifty years of drinking to fit in, starting at 14 in the back of a school bus Why AA's shame-based language kept her stuck, and what changed when she…

In Summer of Love, Kerri Maher writes about wine country glamour, shame that runs across generations, and the woman at the center who can't quite say out loud what she knows about herself. She lived that from the inside before she could write it clearly. She read Annie Grace's This Naked Mind in its earliest self-published form in 2016, stopped drinking for 15 months, then convinced herself the problem had been unhappiness and let it back in, and spent four more years in the push and pull: a sticky note on the fridge that kept watching her fail, sneak drinking she couldn't rationalize away, and a strange accidental last act at the end of 2021 that finally closed the door. This conversation with Coach Hayley is the first time she's said any of it out loud. Kerri and Coach Hayley discuss: What Kerri's first, unspoken reaction to a friend's news told her about herself — and why she almost didn't register it Why reading Annie Grace's This Naked Mind in its earliest self-published edition wasn't the simple end of…

Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 919 If you're trying to figure out how to stop drinking for good, you’ll want to tune in for this episode. Shannon is 14 days alcohol-free and the first person on either side of her family to ever try changing their drinking — and every time a family member sets down their glass because she isn't having one, the guilt shows up right on schedule. Amy read This Naked Mind five years ago, went alcohol-free for five months, lost her mother during COVID, and spent five years trying to get back. She's six weeks in now and more afraid of losing it than she's been afraid of anything she's built for herself. Listen and find out what actually gets in the way for both of them.Shannon discusses: Growing up surrounded by heavy drinkers & being the first to step away The guilt she carries when family members say they "won't drink either" on her account Tracing people-pleasing back to a 7-year-old part of herself who learned to be responsible for others' feelings Her ALIVE goal: free, full of…

Tim's Naked Life | EP 918 When AA isn't working, most people assume they're the problem — not committed enough, not broken enough, not at rock bottom enough to figure it all out and make a change. Tim Kelly thought that too. A 30-year sales professional who'd always been able to muscle through whatever came at him, Tim spent years inside 12-step programs and still couldn't stop drinking. In this episode, he sits down with Coach Cole Harvey to talk about what finally changed, and why the answer was never about trying harder. Tim and Coach Cole discuss: What five or six AA meetings a week for years actually felt like inside him, when all the work never brought the contentment he was looking for The night his fiancée found him drinking again and chose to stay, and why Tim believes that one decision may have saved his life Picking up Annie Grace's book and signing up for a Live Alcohol Experiment, the best $48 he's ever spent Why a numbers-driven, 30-year sales professional was skeptical that curiosity could do…

Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 917 What happens when you finally want to stop using alcohol to cope, but the idea of facing everything without it feels almost impossible? In this episode, Kim and Liv bravely step into that very question. They open up about just how easily alcohol became a source of comfort — soothing a nervous system wrecked by family crisis and serving as the one reliable, familiar thing in the uncertainty of life. Astonishingly, what comes next isn’t a battle of willpower. Learning how to cope without alcohol becomes something else entirely - permission to feel, to choose your next step on your own terms, and to discover the strength that's been with you all along. Kim discusses: Giving alcohol the "job" of soothing her nervous system through trauma and crises Why all-or-nothing thinking and shame from a previous recovery program made it harder to move forward The shift from feeling like she needed to "let it all go" to learning to live with her experiences differently Building real…

Sabrina’s Naked Life | EP 916 Trigger Warning: This episode includes mentions of an eating disorder. What does it really take to stop drinking when every warning sign you've been handed just isn't enough? Sabrina grew up watching her father drive drunk, got her own DUI at 17, and spent years treating pregnancy as her only real break from alcohol. It wasn't a rock bottom that finally did it; it was her husband standing at the door with packed bags on Halloween, and four daughters she wasn't willing to lose. Now 18 months alcohol-free, Sabrina is here because she remembers exactly how lonely day one felt, and she wants the next woman to know she doesn't have to feel that way. Sabrina shares what she discovered about how to stop drinking as a mom. Sabrina and Coach Cole discuss: Growing up surrounded by alcohol and no example of what moderate drinking looks like Why DUIs and close calls weren't enough to make her stop Discovering that pregnancy was the only "free pass" she felt she had to be alcohol-free, and…

Trigger Warning: This episode contains references to suicidal ideation, childhood trauma, family violence, and mental illness. Laura has been alcohol-free since Christmas and the voice in her head keeps saying: this isn't going to work for you. Patricia is 83 days in, standing outside in minus-17 degrees watching the moon, finally letting herself cry. Feeling raw after quitting alcohol is exactly where both of them are. Coach Hayley and Coach Zoe don't try to fix it or rush past it. They just sit with it. Laura discusses: Feeling happy on the drive home and immediately wondering if she was doing something wrong How stopping drinking opened up body awareness she didn't know she was missing What it felt like when her shoulders released, her jaw unclenched, and she could finally breathe Using a hand-on-heart practice to respond to emotional cravings instead of reaching for a drink Coach Hayley's reframe: "A thought is not an instruction" Why her morning practice made her smile — and how she almost dismissed it…

Is your life mostly intact — job fine, marriage okay, responsibilities covered — and yet you're drinking every single night and can't quite picture stopping? That's exactly where Tim Knapp was for years, and he was also, at the same time, one of the people other people called in a crisis. He spent over a decade working inside addiction recovery programs, walking men out of homelessness and incarceration, understanding the neuroscience of dependency from the inside out. High-functioning doesn't mean fine, and Tim's story is one of the most honest, clear-eyed accounts of what it actually looks like when the two things are true at once. Tim and Coach Cole discuss: Growing up in small-town Oklahoma and discovering the buzz at age 12 — including a homemade raisin wine operation that launched a decade-long love affair with the altered state Why Tim loved the buzz itself more than the taste, and how that distinction became the key to his freedom Working at the Bowery Mission in New York City while his own drinking…

Have you ever gotten exactly what you wanted, only to wait for something to go wrong? That's where Brenda is in today's episode — alcohol-free, feeling like herself again, and quietly afraid to believe it will last. In the second session, Emma has spent five years in a cycle she can't seem to break, and she finally gets a look at what's really underneath it. Two coaches, two guests, two conversations that go to some genuinely surprising places. Brenda discusses: Why her alcohol freedom has felt "too easy" — and what that fear is really about How knowledge and science shifted her desire, not just her behavior The one-year and five-year visualization exercise that changed everything Reframing past "failures" as data points that guided her to exactly where she is Building self-trust day by day through The Path community And more… Emma discusses: Her five-year cycle of months alcohol-free followed by weeks drinking again Why alcohol gave her permission to feel emotions she couldn't access otherwise Connecting…

Ever used drinking to cope with grief and felt like it wasn’t even a conscious choice but rather a reflex? Jonathan knows that feeling exactly. He'd been living alcohol-free for two and a half years when he lost his father-in-law and then his dad, just months apart, during the pandemic. On the drive home from the funeral, he stopped at a Mexican restaurant and ordered a margarita. He thought he'd have one and go back to his life. Instead, the door that had been closed swung open, and the whole cycle started over. This conversation with Coach Cole is about grief, identity, and what it really takes to find your way back to yourself. Jonathan and Coach Cole discuss: How a scuba trip at sixteen taught Jonathan that alcohol was the price of admission for real connection, and how that belief quietly ran the show for twenty-five years Building his identity around being the life of the party through the service industry years, and the first time he realized he had no off switch Spending an entire Renaissance…

What if the thing keeping you stuck isn't a lack of willpower, but a lack of understanding what's really driving you back? Linda has nearly 100 days alcohol-free and is starting to wonder if she trusts herself more than she thinks she does. Jane is asking a question she's carried for decades: why do I keep going back to something that gives me nothing anymore? In this episode, Coach Cole and Coach Zoe meet each of them right where they are, with warmth, honesty, and zero judgment. If you've ever felt confused by your own relationship with alcohol, you're going to feel very seen here. Linda discusses: Whether Antabuse has become a crutch, and what she realizes A self-trust check-in that shifts when she remembers an overlooked moment Finding an unopened margarita and pouring it down the drain without a second thought The difference between running from a past she doesn't want and moving toward a future that actually pulls her Building trust through evidence: 99 days, four big holidays, and choices she barely…

What does it take to finally break the alcohol shame spiral when it's been running your life for decades? Krista knows the cycle well: a data point, the crushing shame that followed, a vow to do better, and then the slow, sneaky creep back to hiding bottles and pulling over on the side of the road to drink before going home. In this episode, she sits down with Coach Cole Harvey to share the full arc of her journey, from a childhood in the American South to bartending in New York City, to raising two kids in rural Ireland with no family nearby, to the night something finally, irreversibly shifted. A year into her alcohol-free life, Krista is clear: the work was hard, and she has never once looked back. In this episode, Krista and Coach Cole discuss: Growing up with alcohol woven into every family gathering, and starting drinking at 12 or 13 as a way to finally feel like she belonged Bartending in New York City in her twenties, closing bars with no memory of getting home, and knowing even then that something…

Trigger Warning: This episode includes conversations about grief, loss of loved ones, family estrangement, trauma, and depression. Have you ever been in so much pain that reaching for a drink just felt like the most human thing to do? That is exactly where today's two guests have been, and this episode will meet you right there. First up is Cathy, 87 days alcohol-free, who joins Coach Cole to work through something she has been quietly carrying for years: a sibling estrangement that started when her family fell apart after her mom passed. She reached out. They pulled away. The hurt stuck around. Then there is Mike, 65 days alcohol-free, who opens up to Coach Zoe about a grief timeline that unfolded faster than he could process: his mom, his estranged brother, a DNR call made from behind the wheel of his car. Drinking to deal with loss became the only language he had for a while, and the depression that came with it crept in so quietly he did not even see it happening. What both of them found inside The Path…

Wondering how I stopped drinking after trying to moderate for years? "Have I got a story for you!" says Michele. She ran a business, raised her daughter, kept things moving — and drank every night in a relationship where no one questioned it. Then the pandemic stripped away her structure, her purpose, and everything that had kept things manageable. She tried cutting back. She tried understanding it. Nothing stuck — until This Naked Mind gave her something willpower alone never could: a real understanding of what alcohol was doing to her, and the freedom to simply stop wanting it. Michele and Coach Cole discuss: How a functional habit quietly grew through a painful breakup, pandemic isolation, and lost purpose Why Michele spent her first year using This Naked Mind while still trying to moderate — and what finally changed The hospitalization that became her line in the sand How This Naked Mind helped her understand what alcohol was actually doing to her body and brain How shame became the thing that made…

Trigger warning: This episode contains references to domestic violence, suicidal ideation, & self-harm ideation. If you've been wondering how to rebuild self-worth after drinking, this episode will meet you right where you are. Coach Zoe coaches Katia through the power of her "alive goal" — learning to love the girl in the mirror after years of not being able to look at her own reflection. Then Coach Cole walks Tracey through meeting her inner critic with curiosity rather than shame. These coaching sessions are raw, real, and deeply human. Learning to trust yourself sober starts with understanding where that harsh inner voice came from — and realizing you don't have to keep carrying what was never yours to begin with. Katia discusses: What an "alive goal" is and why it changes everything Years of avoiding mirrors and not recognizing herself A violent relationship, emotional eating, and the weight of survival Drawing a picture of herself — and seeing who she really is inside Giving herself permission to heal…

What if the thing you thought was holding your life together was actually pulling you under? JiAna spent years reaching for alcohol not because she wanted to drink but because she was living in relentless pain and nobody had anything better to offer her. Between a chronic illness that left her on the floor and a culture that pushed wine at baby showers and playgroups, it made a terrible kind of sense. But slowly, joy started disappearing. The glimmers faded. That's when she knew something had to change. JiAna describes how coaching helped her change her drinking not through shame or rigid rules, but through curiosity, community, and the kind of compassion she'd never been shown — or shown herself. In this episode, JiAna and Coach Cole discuss: Familial drinking culture and alcohol being normalized from childhood Endometriosis, chronic pain, and why alcohol felt like the only option Losing the ability to find joy — the quiet signal that something was wrong Why shame-free support felt strange at first and…

Have you ever done everything "right" and still felt like alcohol had the upper hand? You're not alone — and there's a really good reason for that. Coach Hayley coaches M through the fear and doubt swirling around her upcoming break, while Coach Zoe helps Lawrence see that his drinking is actually rooted in a rebellious 15-year-old who never got to grow up. When you understand why willpower fails with alcohol, everything starts falling into place. M discusses: Why willpower fails with alcohol when “just one” never feels like enough Fear of forever, and why one day at a time feels safer Drinking alone, hiding, and the pain of not feeling like herself Using experiments and data instead of shame Wanting peace, sleep, and self-trust more than wine Learning to meet her authentic self with curiosity And more… Lawrence discusses: The childhood roots of rebellion and how they shaped his drinking Why alcohol stopped feeling freeing and started feeling costly Health, sleep, and relationships taking the hit Realizing…

What happens when the thing you're most afraid to lose is also the thing quietly costing you everything? Anne grew up in a home where five o'clock cocktails were as reliable as the sunset. Drinking was culture, celebration, and comfort, and for a long time, it felt completely earned. But through two pregnancies, her parents' declining health, and eventually losing both of them, a bottle a night became two. A blackout fight with her husband, one she has zero memory of, became the moment she couldn't look away anymore. She found This Naked Mind, joined The Path in October 2023, and started doing the unglamorous daily work. "Looking back, I can see how I rewired my mindset around drinking," Anne says. "It was subtle. It just got a little easier and a little easier." Two and a half years later, she's present, she's lucid at 11:30 PM when her kids need her, and she's collecting memories she actually gets to keep. In this episode, Anne and Coach Cole talk about: The family culture that made drinking feel normal,…

Does it ever feel like you know everything there is to know about why you drink, and none of it is enough to make you stop? You're not alone in that. In this episode, Coaches Hayley and Cole each sit with a Path member who's been carrying that exact weight. Audrey has 20 years of binge drinking, a ton of quit lit under her belt, and a shame so deep she's not sure she deserves to feel better. Savannah is eight days in and quietly discovering that figuring out how to stop drinking when you're lonely gets a little more possible when you stop white-knuckling it alone and actually lean into the community around you. Audrey discusses: Why shame and isolation kept her stuck in the drinking cycle The belief that alcohol was the only way to numb emotional pain Reframing fear and staying open to new tools Why community matters when learning how to stop drinking when you’re lonely Moving from self-judgment toward self-compassion Building a life that feels more aligned and less escapable And more topics… Savannah…

What is gray area drinking for women – and what happens when “drink less” slowly turns into “I don’t even want this anymore”? In this Where Are They Now conversation, Calley returns after first appearing on the podcast in October 2019 to share what seven years alcohol-free really looks like. Talking with Coach Hayley, she reflects on motherhood, moving, social discomfort, and the quiet but powerful shift from worrying about what was in her glass to simply living free. It’s an honest, encouraging look at what changes when curiosity replaces shame and alcohol stops taking up so much space in your mind. Calley and Hayley discuss: Motherhood, moving, and realizing wine was taking up more space than she wanted What is gray area drinking for women—and why curiosity matters before things feel “serious enough.” From social discomfort to feeling fully at home in her alcohol-free skin Honest conversations with kids about alcohol, pressure, and awareness Why community, compassion, and knowledge matter more than shame…

What if the fun was never actually in the drink? What is the best way to stop associating fun with alcohol? Zion called alcohol the "jewelry" of life, the thing that made every moment glitter, and spent years believing that celebrations, friendships, and good food just needed a cocktail to feel complete. Audra built her whole identity around being the bold one who drank scotch and bourbon and never said no to a good time. Now both are exploring living alcohol-free and finding the fun in that. Coaches Cole and Zoe are right there with them. Zion discusses: Why alcohol became the “jewelry” on dinners, concerts, holidays, & friendships The wake-up call of planning a great night & not remembering any of it How people-pleasing & fear of “rocking the boat” kept drinking tied to fun What trivia night & Thanksgiving taught him about being alcohol-free in real life Why awkward moments do not have to mean something is wrong What is the best way to stop associating fun with alcohol? For Zion, it starts with curiosity,…

What made me question my drinking? “It wasn't a rock bottom — it was a barstool, a mirror, and a quiet voice asking where this road was headed,” says Kelly. Kelly grew up in a drinking household, spent years drinking daily, and was smart enough to see the writing on the wall before things got worse. Five years later, she joins Coach Cole to share the health wake-up call, the book that changed everything, and how The Path gave her the tools to finally walk away for good. Kelly and Cole discuss: How drinking became the unquestioned norm The decade of daily drinking that crept in through stress, social life, and relationship habits What made me question my drinking: health symptoms, a telling look around the bar, and a sister's timely recommendation Reading This Naked Mind and feeling like Annie Grace had written her exact story Why giving herself one year felt safer than forever The vacation experiment that showed her exactly what alcohol was still costing her How stopping drinking didn't just clear her head…

Trigger Warning: This episode contains references to grief and the loss of a child. What alcohol was really costing me was my peace, my presence, and a life that felt true and authentic. That's the realization both Michelle and Susan come to with the help of Coaches Hayley and Cole. Michelle just hit 30 days and is only now connecting the dots between what alcohol was really costing her and the fear, impatience, and disconnection she'd written off as just life. Susan is alcohol-free and sitting with a grief so deep she wonders if she deserves to feel better at all. This one is real, raw, and worth every minute. In Michelle’s session: Why wine still felt tempting even when she knew it was no longer serving her The link between drinking, marriage, routine, and end-of-day shutdown Creating new patterns, from different seats on the couch to different drinks at dinner Noticing how alcohol affects patience, sleep, stress, and health data Questioning the fear that changing her drinking could change her marriage…

What does it take to finally walk away from drinking when you love the party, love your people, and have never once thought of yourself as someone with a problem? Brooke was a high-functioning extrovert running a business and raising a family when a quiet voice in her head kept telling her something was off. Once she found The Path and started doing the real work, she discovered how alcohol-free living improved her anxiety in ways she never anticipated, and two and a half years later she has not looked back once. Brooke discusses: The brain scan that first linked her alcohol use to her health and sparked a decade-long journey toward change Taking 10 months alcohol-free, returning to drinking after a family trip, and why she never judged herself for it How COVID neighborhood happy hours quietly accelerated her relationship with alcohol Joining The Path in August 2023 and the hungover weekend trip that became her last Discovering she was an extrovert living with social anxiety and how that reframed everything…